but it's not my birthday

I haven't really mentioned The Flu Season here yet.

Well, THE FLU SEASON!

We're producing this play by Will Eno at Thorne's in Northampton May 11-20. Last night, Adam and Jen C. posed for some quite attractive publicity photos.

(It should be noted that both Adam and Jen C. are in the play).

If I thought you the passive aggressive type, I wouldn't have entrusted you with my eulogy.

When reading the newspaper, there are a few things to keep in mind (mental shortcuts, if you will):

1. If the event happened between the hours of 12am and 6am, it's bad news.
2. Anytime you see the following words or phrases, something has gone horribly, horribly wrong:
   • the body has been found
   • the body has not been found
   • tasered
   • blood alcohol level
   • left the bar
   • police
   • last seen heading [east/west/north/south or some combination thereof]
   • Germany
   • blood-soaked [article of clothing]
   • rescue crews
   • strewn across the roadway
   • DNA evidence
   • CPS
3. If there is a bloodless photo of (a) animals or (b) children on the front page, it is a very slow news day (or a silly paper)
4. If there is a smiling adult on the front page, see rule #3 (exception: sports stories and peace accords)
5. Stories in the Features/Local section are written by writers who are bored shitless
6. Every 5 days there will be at least one story featuring a monkey, in some form or fashion

Of course, there are more. But this is all I have right now. I will try to update you later as I see fit.

Do you love me? If you ever did, YOU WON'T ANYMORE!

I'm so very very sorry.

changes

Do you remember when we first met? I do. It doesn't seem so long ago. In some ways, anyway, it does. Time is deceptively quick but agonizing memories tend to elongate our nostalgia. I loved you then. I love you now, too. Just different. ly. Differently.

HEY!

Trivia question for you...

What percentage of men are 6ft tall or taller? Answer (highlight the blank space below):

100%... Only males 6ft or taller can be considered Men!

why are you a white Brit?

Saw a commercial for ABC's The Ten Commandments and wondered a couple of things:

1. If Moses was a slave, why does he talk with such a refined British accent?

2. If Moses was born to Egyptian Hebrews, why is he white?

I think I experience similar confusion with the pasty-white, British-sounding Spanish slaves from Gladiator.

join my bracket pool!

I love basketball. YOU love basketball. Let's love it together... real hard.

You should join my Tournament Bracket pool. Even if you don't follow college basketball, don't shy away. Sometimes even people who don't know the first thing about the sport can win their groups. (Perfect example: Kevin won the pool last year by just picking the sexiest point guards!)

Here's how to do it (I'm just cutting and pasting from Yahoo!):

Go to the game front page and click on the "Sign Up" button to create a team. After completing registration, or if you already have a team, click the "Create or Join Group" button and follow the path to join an existing private group. Then, when prompted, enter the following information...

Group ID#: 42534
Password: uranus

And don't go telling everyone the password. I'm trying to keep uranus a secret.

you look great today!

I meant to tell you this earlier, but I think you look great, today!

Did you get a haircut?

There's just a certain gleam in your eye, extra bounce in your step, and (i hesitate to say this out loud for fear of embarassing you) I caught you skipping and whistling earlier this morning.

You must tell me what's given you such an energetic glow!

Whatever you've done with yourself, you look fantastic!

you look great today!

I meant to tell you this earlier, but I think you look great, today!

Did you get a haircut?

There's just a certain gleam in your eye, extra bounce in your step, and (i hesitate to say this out loud for fear of embarassing you) I caught you skipping and whistling earlier this morning.

You must tell me what's given you such an energetic glow!

Whatever you've done with yourself, you look fantastic!

Adwords

Sent out an email to my cast this week. Adam responded with "stupid."

So I replied with "YOU'RE stupid."

Then, in my gmail account, I looked to the right to see the following AdWords:

Improve Literacy Skills
Discover how sustained silent reading can improve literacy.
shop.ascd.org

Raz-Kids phonics for K-3
Online interactive books with sound and animation to teach phoincs.
www.raz-kids.com/

Free Children CD-Rom
Over 50 fun, educational activities & games on incredible CD - Free
www.ThinkAll.com

Teach Reading Classes
Find Education Near You for a Career as a Reading Teacher.
www.UniversityOfPhoenix-Info.com